If you’re a regular visitor to Brazen Woman and are a member of the ultra secret, uber-awesome Facebook group, the Brazen Woman Insiders, then you’ve probably read a few articles about how your mindset changes as you get older. Recently, one of my fellow Insiders shared an article titled 13 F*cks You Stop Giving When You’re a Grown Woman that really resonated with me, especially number 1 (other people’s opinions) and number 8 (fitting in).

The Brazen Insiders is a place for women of a certain age to spill and share anything and everything—as long as it’s not about being a mommy or kid stuff. Because I’m 42, I find that what is shared in the group is empowering, uplifting and sometimes, just what I need to realize that I’m not the only one going through [insert weird body thing or relationship thing or life thing here]. This group sometimes saves my sanity.

It seems to me that we women typically spend our 20s doing the important job of figuring out who we are. But in the process, we are constantly trying to be what we think others want us to be and we spend a lot of time caring a LOT about what other people think. In our 30s, we start caring a little less what the world thinks, but we’re still not as evolved as we will be. We’re still trying to “keep up with the Jones’s”, navigate this ocean of life and figure out what is really important.

Things change in your 40s. Because I’m 42, I just don’t give a F*ck about a lot of things anymore. And this is a good thing. A VERY good thing.

Because I’m 42, I’ve taken ownership of my life. I feel great about where I am in my career. I’m proud of the fact that I had the courage (and support system) to quit my stressful “office job” and choose to work part-time from home, for the hours that work for me and my commitments. I’m thankful every day for the opportunities that have been given to me by some amazing friends and colleagues. I have more time to give to my family and have to give less f*cks to a big corporation that doesn’t necessarily care about my well-being. Not to mention, I can work in my yoga pants every single day if I so choose. 

Because I’m 42, I have lost people close to me which really hurts and sucks. It’s part of the life cycle, I know, but when you start seeing your family at more funerals than weddings, you realize how short life really is. It helps to add fuel to caring less about what others think and more about what makes you feel good. It makes it easier to say NO when you should and to say YES when doing so makes you happy.

How Life Changes When You're Over 40Because I’m 42 and feeling empowered {see all points above}, I did something that I’ve always wanted to do but didn‘t because for way too long, I cared way too much about what other people might think. Last week, I dyed my hair pink. Pretty, pastel, beautiful pink—my favourite colour. When I told my sister (who shall not be named, although I only have one…) that I was considering this bold move, her response was, You’re 42, you’re too old to do that.

Au contraire! Because I’m 42, NOW IS THE TIME to live on the edge, to try new things, to GO FOR IT! To be BRAZEN!

I think I totally rock the pink hair and I am quite pleased with the result. It’s soft and pretty, not bold and outrageous, which is what I was going for. Most of all, it made me happy and that was the point. Because I’m 42. I have arrived. 

Is there anything bold and brazen you’ve been dying to do that you haven’t for fear of being judged? Time to break out. Tell us what it is in the Insiders Group on Facebook, on Instagram and Twitter, and anywhere else you hang out. Here are the hashtags: #BecauseImOver40 #PinkHairDontCare

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