It doesn’t have to be January 1st to make a New Year’s resolution, especially when it’s an exciting one—one that involves your sex life. Good sex is always a top priority and let’s face it, improve your sex life and you improve your life in general. With that goal in mind, I asked a number of fellow Brazen Woman readers to turn their minds to what kinds of sex resolutions they have for this year, and some suggestions on how to make them happen.
5 Sex Resolutions to Improve Your Sex Life
SEX RESOLUTION #1: HAVE MORE SEX
The number one answer from you ladies was to have more sex.
HOW TO GET THERE: To accomplish this, you may need to step out of your comfort zone and be more aggressive in the bedroom. To have more sex, you have to do more than just tell your partner you want to have sex more this year. Saying it is not doing it, so put on that sexy lingerie you haven’t worn in years, put the moves on your man by asking him to join you in the shower, or get your heart racing by being the aggressor and waking him up in the middle of the night for some late night nookie.
SEX RESOLUTION #2: TRY NEW POSITIONS
The runner up to having more sex is the resolution to try new Kamasutra positions.
HOW TO GET THERE: Most people simply don’t have time to have sex daily. With that thought in mind, why not aim for checking off one new position a week instead of this daily nonsense. Although it’s only the second week in January, my husband and I have already gotten off to a good start and have checked off three new positions. There are tons of positions available online that you can obtain for free. I suggest printing each one off and adding your own thermometer to the page, save them in a folder and at the end of the year, look at how you did keeping up with your resolution.
SEX RESOLUTION #3:
The third spot in the top five sex resolutions is to be more adventurous.
HOW TO GET THERE: Half of you who have this goal are talking about moving your sex life out of the bedroom. Try doing it on the kitchen table, in the recliner, on the floor where you can get some rug burns and remember your fun night the next day, or have sex in the heat of the shower. The other half of you are looking to be more adventurous by secretly having sex in public places like the bathroom, in your car, the swimming pool, or out in the woods. No matter which half you are, repeat this phrase to yourself throughout the year: To be adventurous, I must be spontaneous. That means acting on your desires when you have them.
SEX RESOLUTION #4:
And number four is: Try BDSM.
HOW TO GET THERE: By now, most of us have read or seen Fifty Shades of Grey, and the story has piqued interest to experience a little of this lifestyle firsthand. As a person who lives this lifestyle, I can tell you that it’s a touchy subject. An easy suggestion I can give to beginners is to start very slow. In other words, experience being spanked by the hand, a hairbrush, wooden spoon, or paddle, for instance, before getting a flogger.
Here are some other points to keep in mind:
- Each item will give you a different sting, but what’s most important is that the person swatting you is experiencing how hard to swing the item being used and reading how your body responds.
- Any item your partner uses on you should be tested on him first so he can feel what you’re going to feel. A great place for that testing is on his inner thigh, which will give him the kind of sting he will be inflicting.
- Once you’re both ready to try the flogger, he should test it on his bare back by swinging it over his shoulder. Be aware that when you bringing something in that has tassels, the swing of the arm will be very different than simply using a hairbrush.
- The Dom should give himself plenty of space to swing and should start slow.
- As a beginner to this experience, it is your job to tell him if he can swing harder.
- Stay tuned for more details about BDSM for Beginners in future articles.
SEX RESOLUTION #5:
The final resolution to make the list is to have a threesome.
HOW TO GET THERE: Inviting a third person into the bedroom is risky if you don’t choose wisely. When my partner and I did it, I was the one who made the final decision and the rules. No kissing was one of my personal rules. I made sure to pick someone I could trust not to steal my man and would treat this as it was—just sex. Of course, it was important that she was STD free. Our threesome went very well and to this day I’m still friends with her. There is no awkward tension between us and she can hug my husband without me getting jealous. This is most certainly not how it happens for a lot of other couples, so I can’t stress enough to choose your person wisely and remember there’s no need to rush to pick someone. You’ve gone this long without having a threesome and doing it should never be the make or break deal in a relationship. If it is, you’re with the wrong person and having a threesome isn’t going strengthen your bond.
